Sex and the Belly: How the pot Belly stands in the way of good Sex
We all crave and deserve happiness. Throughout the history of humankind, sexual satisfaction has been one of the most sought after among all the human needs and wants. Besides the fleeting yet mystic bodily pleasure that accompanies a good orgasm, sex has been associated with a decrease in stress. It is also a good way to boost self esteem especially when it is done within the confines or a decent relationship such as a marriage. I bring up this point because cheap sex with a prostitute or an easy pick who quickly nods and strips leaves one feeling hollow and dirty.
Miss Universe 2011 Leila Lopes qualifies as the average weight girl. Many plus size girls like pretending to be average.
Peripheral issues surrounding sex have always been body types. But I want to make it clear that body structures are never peripheral to sexual satisfaction. Sex, especially, penetrative sex, is deeply related to body structure. If you are as curious as I am, you may have asked yourself whether the plus size waitress or the pot bellied bouncer enjoys sex like your slim or skinny brother or sister. You may have even wondered how two plus size individuals can have sex. These are vital issues that we all need to ponder as we go about the business of selecting partners of the opposite sex (or same sex for those who are in this category) to travel with in this journey we call life. Buckle your seat belt and cruise with me as we tackle these touchy issues related to sex and the body.
Anita Marshall: After gaining weight and entering the “plus size” category.
The Fat Guy and the Fat Woman
Fat can also be described as overweight or obese. For purposes of this topic of sex and the body, fat will include having a pot belly that might not be accompanied by excessive bodily tissue on other body parts. The trickiest sexual encounter is between the fat man and the fat woman. The extra tissue on the woman’s midriff and the man’s sagging or full mid-region will act as opposing cones. This will make it difficult for the man’s “stirring rod” to reach the woman’s “beaker.” In this case, even if the man is as endowed as the donkeys of Afghanistan or Buffalo Bill’s Silver Stallion, he will struggle to get to the Promised Land. It is only the tip of the iceberg that will rub the labia leaving the woman yawning hungrily as she yearns for more. On his part, the fat guy will definitely release far from where it is expected, thus messing her, himself, and the surface, assuming no protection is in the picture.
It is extremely disadvantageous when this is in marriage and the couples are eager to sire. Biology states that semen should be pushed further up into the fallopian tubes if the chances of conception are to be increased. Therefore, limited access to the vagina by the man’s stirring rod works against the mission to conceive.
Stylistic solutions? Not any that I can think of. Penetrative sex is never accomplished satisfactorily between a man and a woman whose weight is above medium. Missionary is certainly out of the picture. Man from behind popularly referred to as “doggy” also loses out because the woman’s oversize booty and the man’s belly push against each other thus limiting access.
Solution:
All big bodied guys are strongly advised to look for slim, slender, or skinny women for sex, marriage, and childbearing. But most importantly, they should do this if they seek satisfactory penetrative sex. Similarly, plus-size sisters who want to feel something inside them when the game is on have to pick that skinny brother out there. This is the guy who will be able to go places since he has little that will prevent him. While your heavy thighs can be a barrier to the big guy, this skinny fellow will smoothly navigate and get into Paradise, illuminate all the corners there, and hold your hand tenderly, taking you there too.
Another advantage associated with this pairing is that since most of these skinny fellows are slightly advantaged and therefore able to go places, they cannot hurt the plus-size sister whose fatty cushioning helps them both.
Caution: The plus-size sister should not expect to swept off her feet, literally, the way average to small bodied women are carried by their men around the house. If you want your skinny guy to carry you once in a while, you might wanna cut some of that weight.
Photo: The ideal girl for the Big Brother
Skinny Guy and Skinny Girl
The unlimited access made possible by two skinny bodies can be quite a thrill for both but in the event that the guy is averagely to well endowed, the girl will get hurt. This type of sex is also quite tiring for the guy since he has to keep pushing as his mind misleads him that he might not have reached where she wants. By the end of it all, the girl will get hurt and the guy will be extremely tired. In rare but possible cases, both the stirring rod and the beaker can get bruised. Well, none of them will break but the bruising is not such a good thing either.
Victoria’s Secret Model Alesandra Ambrosio qualifies as a skinny girl in this photo
The Skinny/Slim Guy-He has the advantage of performing well with both the plus size girl and the skinny girl but it is better if he gets himself a plus size girl.
Solution:
The slim, slender, and skinny girls should open their hearts to the big brothers. The slim, skinny, or slender fellows also need to move away from the skinny women. Hey slim guys, your services are more useful with the big sisters. We know the small sisters want you but no! Go to those who need you more, those who cannot enjoy both the slim guys and the big brothers.
The Big Brother-He should get the skinny girl!
After word: You have seen that almost retiring civil servant who learned to drive at 50, bought his X-Trail at 51, and keeps on calling that skinny little girl from Umoja……it is because she is more sexually satisfying to him than his 47 year old woman whose permanent bump and the old mzee’s pot belly cannot pave way for sweet sex. The old mama’s bump is a mark of honor-evidence that she has born and reared children. But even the aged cat craves some milk. The only crime the mzee commits is that the girl would be young enough to be his granddaughter.
In a reverse mode, the 47 year old mama may also be calling the 34 year old skinny watchman every time mzee hits the road to say hi to his brother (usually a lie to cover a tryst with the skinny girl). It is because mama wants it and mzee cannot deliver- his stirring rod has been pushed far back by the protruding belly.
Before embarking on the search for a partner, take an honest look at your body. People, especially women love self-denial. A plus-size woman will often claim “my body is just average” thinking that such a delusion will actually make it average. Well, it won’t. Look at your body, find out where it lies, then get the right partner. Rushing to pick someone without consideration will lead to lack of sexual satisfaction which leads to other issues such as cheating, stress, depression, break-ups, and divorce. While most people will pretend otherwise, the few honest men and women out there will agree with me that sex issues break more relationships than anything else. Yes, that football in between the sheets matters.
This article was written by Maggie Karanu. All the opinions expressed in it are hers and in no way reflect the official position of CAP.